My name is Tiger. I first introduced readers to my slouching talents in The Advanced Art Of Sitting On The Feline Tush, commonly referred to as Slouching. The article features photos and my thoughts on ten classic slouching situations. If slouching was an Olympic sport, I would be a gold metal contender. In this second article, I will expand your knowledge of slouching by introducing you to another 10 positions and styles.
#1 The Kitchen Slouch
Sometimes I sit in the kitchen, slouching against a cabinet instead of the wall. That way I am purrfectly positioned to catch any errant crumbs of cheese or tuna that may come my way. The urge to sit has no bounds!
#2 The Bed Slouch
Sometimes I like to sit on the bed and casually relax against nicely plumped pillows. I highly recommend this when the floor is feeling a tad too hard to provide adequate comfort for the feline anatomy.
#3 The Bed Slouch / Ultimate Relaxation
When I strut around the house, my somewhat generous tummy hangs down and waddles to and fro. My “mom” affectionately calls my tummy a “woobie”. Sometimes I prefer to slouch against pillows, spread my back legs and let my woobie hang out for the ultimate in relaxation.
#4 The Sofa Slouch
If the bed is not available (when the humans have closed the bedroom door), I sometimes like to sit on the sofa. While it is not my first choice, the sofa can be a comfortable place to slouch. Please note: If your sofa should happen to match your coat too closely, there is a danger of a human accidentally sitting ON YOU – so be vigilant!
#5 The Sofa Slouch + Nap
As with the Wall Slouch, sometimes I combine the Sofa Slouch with a short snooze.
#6 The Sofa Full Slouch
Sometimes I can’t resist the comfort of a softly padded sofa, and I start to fall over when I sit. This position can be mistaken as laying down, but this is not a deliberate attempt to recline. It should be viewed as a simple loss of balance. It is more likely to happen when the sofa slouch has been combined with a nap.
#7 Sofa Slouch Reverse Recline
If you do happen to fall into a full slouch, you can take advantage of the position by rolling onto your back and then swiveling your body until your head is hanging off the edge of the seat of the sofa. Although this is not technically a “slouch” it is such a unique position I just HAD to include it in this collection.
#8 The Talking Slouch
Just because you are slouching, it doesn’t mean you don’t have other needs — and you should let those needs be known. Or perhaps you just want an audience to admire your slouching expertise. In either case, don’t hesitate to call out for attention!
#9 Pool Slouching
Talk your mom into getting a plastic “kiddie” pool and you can turn it into a “kitty” pool that is purrfect for slouching in on hot summer days . . . Water is optional.
#10 My Rear End Is Falling Asleep
Beware: One of the dangers of too much slouching is that it can limit the circulation to the feline butt. The blood starts to pool in your rear end to the point that you may start to lose feeling in your behind. You can improve your circulation by occasionally raising the position of your posterior higher than your front end. Try sitting on a raised platform 4-7 inches high while maintaining your front legs at floor level. This position encourages the blood from your rear end to travel to your front paws.
My Final Thoughts On Slouching
So, my feline friends, next time you feel the urge to sit, remember your British Shorthair guru and let your creative juices flow. You have so many more options than you think. Connect with your lazy inner kitty and a “slouch” variation is guaranteed to come to mind.