The Premier Online Magazine devoted to Persian & Exotic Shorthair Cats
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The Premier Online Magazine
devoted to Persian & Exotic Shorthair Cats

Close this search box.


The Premier Online Magazine devoted
to Persian & Exotic Shorthair Cats

Close this search box.

Bonding With Your Cat

There is only one word for love in the English language. Other languages have different words for different kinds of love. There is romantic love, of course. But there is also the love of a parent for their child. The love of friends. The love of members of a team, or a student for a mentor.

But how does your cat love you? Does the cat love you the same way it loves its favorite toy? Or a tasty treat? Or a feline best buddy? Maybe you’re not sure if your cat loves you? Do you wish your cat showed you more affection? How exactly do you define feline love anyway?

How Do You Tell Your Cat Loves You?

Love has been defined as an affection of the mind caused by that which delights. It has also been defined as a strong liking or devoted attachment to an individual. Either definition works quite well when it comes to describing the love of a cat for its owner and it is clear that most pets of this type are eminently capable of feeling and radiating love.

Cats have differing capacities to bond strongly with (or “to love”) their owners. The capacity for love is determined by a combination of genetics and upbringing. Each cat is born with an innate ability to bond, although there is a range of possibilities of how much it will bond and to what or who. 

How a cat’s love develops (or not) is dependent on what experiences it has as a young kitten.

Bonding With Your Cat

How can you make your bond with your cat stronger? Here are some tips:

  • Frequent Petting & Chin Rubs: The more affection you give your cat, the more it is likely to welcome your attentions.
  • Loving The Hand That Feeds: Like with men, the way to a cat’s heart is often through its stomach. Most cats prefer the human who provides them with food, so if you want your cat to love you, be sure you are the one who fills up the food bowl. When kitty does something good, reward it with a special treat.
  • Grooming Can Be A Bonding Experience: Most cats love to be brushed as long as you introduce it to them as young kittens and are gentle.
  • Keep Kitty Company: Especially when you first get your cat, don’t leave it alone for long. If you do have to leave, make sure your cat has enough food and to love and fuss over it when you come back. Make sure your cat knows you missed them.
  • Don’t Be Too Needy: Invite the kitty onto your lap, but don’t force it.
  • Talk To Your Cat: Talk often enough to your cat and it will start to understand some of what you say – especially its name. Be bilingual — talk to kitty both with human words and cat-like chirps and soft mews..
  • Playtime: Use a string or a toy to interact with them, make sure you interact as well or they wont have as much fun with you.
  • Allow Kitty Some Alone Time: Just like any person, cats need their personal space too! Remember not to be on top of them all the time. Don’t smother them; cats hate that. It doesn’t always want attention, if it’s sleeping peacefully, don’t disturb it, let it rest.
  • Reciprocate: When the cat sits in your lap purring and closes it eyes after looking directly at you, it is inviting you to pet it some more.
  • Get Down On The Cat’s Level: Bring your face down to the cat’s eye level by joining it on the floor or inviting it up on your bed when you are laying down.
  • Invite Kitty On To Your Lap: When watching TV, ask your cat to join you. Catch its attention by calling its name then pat your lap. Most cats welcome a lap nap.

If your cat nudges you with its head, it means it likes you.


Love is a two-way street. The majority of cat owners who have a healthy affection or love for their cat will find that love reciprocated by their appreciative pet. Everybody needs somebody and pets need somebody, too. Cats, while capable of independence, seem to prefer company and know when they are loved.

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“Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want.”
*Joseph Wood Krutch (American writer & naturalist)