Cat Laws

Photos copyrighted by the individual photographers
Article copyright © All Rights Reserved.
Copying or redistribution of this article is strictly prohibited
without the express written permission of

After much research and study, scientists have uncovered the basic laws that govern all feline behavior . . . .

  • Law of Cat Inertia:
    A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.
  • Law of Cat Motion:
    A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.
  • Law of Magnetism:
    All blazers and sweaters attract white cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric.
  • Law of Cat Stretching:
    A cat will stretch to a distance proportional to the length of the nap just taken.
  • Laws of Cat Sleeping:
    All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved, and as comfortable as possible for the cat.
  • Law of Cat Elongation:
    A cat can make her body long enough to reach just about any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it.
  • Law of Cat Obstruction:
    A cat must lay on the floor in such a position to obstruct the maximum amount of human foot traffic.
  • Law of Acceleration:
    A cat will accelerate at a constant rate, until he gets good and ready to stop.
  • Law of Dinner Table Attendance:
    Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served.
  • Law of Rug Configuration:
    No rug may remain in its natural flat state for very long.
  • Law of Obedience Resistance:
    A cat`s resistance varies in proportion to a human`s desire for her to do something.
  • First Law of Energy Conservation:
    Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.
  • Second Law of Energy Conservation:
    Cats also know that energy can be stored by a lot of napping.
  • Law of Refrigerator Observation:
    If a cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone will come along and take out something good to eat.
  • Law of Random Comfort Seeking:
    A cat will always seek, and usually take over, the most comfortable spot in any given room.
  • Law of Cat Embarrassment:
    A cat`s irritation rises in direct proportion to her embarrassment, times the amount of human laughter.
  • Law of Furniture Replacement:
    A cat`s desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.
  • Law of Cat Landing:
    A cat will always land in the softest place possible; often the mid-section of an unsuspecting, reclining human.
  • Law of Cat Disinterest:
    A cat`s interest level will vary in inverse proportion to the amount of effort a human expends in trying to interest him.
  • Law of Pill Rejection:
    Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.

    and finally . . .

  • Law of Composition:
    A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn`t Matter.

Back :: Top :: Home



Legal Disclaimer | Report A Broken Link or Typo

Website created & maintained by
ShowCatsOnline Web Design